san francisco
July 12th, 2006 . by mattI just returned from a trip to the west coast, to visit my friend Mike Winger. He has been trying to get me to come to San Francisco, the city he moved to five years ago, for about five years now. Now that my schedule is more free than it has been in a while, I hopped a plane and went.
Jump played SF many times, but it’s not easy, especially in midst of a tour, to see anything beyond the venue and a restaurant close by. Mike and I went on scooter tours of most of the entire city, and it’s difficult to describe how beautiful it is. It’s such a well designed, human being focused place… of my favorite cities (which also includes New York, Chicago, and London), it’s obviously one of the most liveable. Like most larger cities, it has all the things you’d want in citified living– great food, lots of opportunities to see and buy things, and tall buildings. But the amazing thing is how the city has managed to incorporate Nature into it’s lifestyle, instead of doing away with it, as most cities seem to. Even Charleston, with its palm tree-lined streets and beaches, has a heavy handed approach to its natural surroundings.
But this isn’t a post about San Francisco. More has been written about that city than anyone could read, I’m sure. Instead, I muse once again about the feelings of frustration I feel upon returning to Charleston. Every time, in recent months I muse… after our amazing adventure in Asheville with Terpsicorps, and now, after being in a city that is obviously not afraid of Art in its many forms. That’s what this blog is for, though, yes? Musings? And didn’t I start this out by wondering whether I’m living in the right place for me, right now?
We’ve worked wonders, I think, with this Cabaret, in regards to Charleston. I know that. People have told us that what we’re doing is vital, and important, to this city. Nothing makes me happier than to hear that. Gosh, if I wasn’t hearing that by now, I’d be gone for sure. I keep going back and forth as to whether it’s my responsibility to stay here, a city I’ve lived in for almost ten years, because every “vital” and “important” artist seems to leave Charleston for “better” places, eventually; or leave, because as an artist I have a whole hell of a lot to learn, and it would be so enriching to be somewhere where knowledge is easier to attain?
In some ways, I’m not old enough to be the person to start an art collective in a town that doesn’t have one. Ten years of being in a rock band doesn’t make you a perfect performer, and the amount I need to learn… what if I could find a place to continue the study, and then come back and shake things up, here? Like, when I’m closer to forty, or something? When I have even more to write about in a grant proposal?
Because I do love this town, Charleston. I always will. But it’s like loving someone that you’re not sure really loves you as much as you love them. You keep trying to do good things for them, and sometimes there are some sexy make-outs, but in general you know you might never fully have their full attention. And I’m speaking as an artist, again. I know that Charleston falls in love every day with many of it’s more lucrative and traditional conservative citizens. I’m not jealous. I just want some more love, damnit. And it’s difficult to get it here. I’m not saying that we don’t have support, but I do know that everyone would agree that it’s an uphill battle, and more so than it could be.
Not that I feel like an outcast, necessarily. But artists in Charleston live on the fringe, for sure. Everytime I tell someone here what I do there is a second of confusion: “What? You make art? Here?” That isn’t the case elsewhere. And there is a part of me that is tired of that.
But again, there is a part of me that wants to change that. The pro-active part of me. The didactic nature in me. I just want to make things better, to bring people together, to make a bigger splash. To banish mediocrity. To rule the world, etc. etc. Can I do that from here? Can I make a difference?
The verdict is still out. I’m giving myself a year from August. That means that I will sign another year lease in my apartment. I’ll prepare for what is next… be it the creation of an art collective in this town, one that will sustain all my friends, and bring others to the beauty of my adopted home… or a move, to a place that Just Makes More Sense. Be it San Francisco, New York City, Asheville, or beyond. A year’s time can put a focusing time limit on Matt’s Next Big Thing, and most of the time Matt needs that kind of focusing. I’ll keep you posted on what happens, if you’re interested.
*is very interested* Yes yes, keep us up to date with what you’re doing.
Follow your bliss, Matt. I hope you come to a decision you are happy and fulfilled by.
(Gah, that sounds horrifically cheesy, but there we have it.)
good luck, matt!! i hope you do get to fulfill your dreams and wishes and ideas in charleston. the city definitely has the potential for this art collective, and given the right push could achieve it the way i think you want. i only wish i could contribute. alas. go ahead and rule the world! after i get my history degree i’ll write a book about it.
and the only time i’ve been to san fran was when i was nine and was in a charter bus full of my extended family. i remember there was lots of red rope licorice involved. i’m certain that’s not the way to see the city.
you can hear it whispering…
….from across the continent….
go west, young man…
….before you’re old…
and you wear your trousers rolled…
and all that other nonsense…
have i really been doing the west coast sales pitch for 5 years now?
good to have you out here
matt,
I feel that if it is what you really want to do and you have enough determination and passion that you can do anything when you think you are ready.
An example, to inspire perhaps: there’s this awesome local CT band, Mighty Purple, who have been around for probably as long as Jump has. A couple years ago Steve Rodgers of this band opened The Space (http://www.thespace.tk) which has become an incredible thing, and as far as I can tell, reasonably successful. It’s an all ages music venue with recording studio space & a thrift store and on top of all that it’s in Connecticut…
Although this probably isn’t exactly what you are thinking of it’s proof that it can be done. And if it can be done fabulously in CT…. then it can certainly be done in Charleston, which to my eyes and ears has just as much, if not more potential to begin with.
Follow your heart and your gut and I wish you luck with whatever you choose to do. I can’t wait to see the results.
I also am very interested. I admire you and love to read your thoughts! (Thanks for writing about this kind of stuff here and letting us know about it.)
Wish I could help you, somehow…! With Kiki, or anything.
But well I have a very good feeling about everything you want to happen.
Your making a big splash will happen. You already have started to make it happen…
Good luck figuring everything out. Sometimes moving to a new place can be just what the doctor ordered, but there is always a price to pay too. Just make sure you do what you feel is necessary, and eventually things do work out.
p.s. I saw Cabaret Kiki in Asheville, and ya’ll rocked my socks off.
Ahhh - San Francisco. It’s truly one of my favorite places on the planet. Not exactly the cheapest place to take up residence, but definitely worth trying.
This writing is interesting because I’ve had this very conversation with a friend of mine. He’s an artist and teacher, and I’m a friend and former student. I remember one specific conversation where he talked about whether or not to leave Charleston.
He too, was interested (and still is, to my knowledge) in starting an artist’s collective. But it can be so damned hard to get things moving here. Right now he’s finishing his master’s and may decide to head out west, or up north when he’s done. He too was struggling with the question of whether or not he could be of more use by staying here and “fighting the good fight” or by getting out of here and trying to make an impact in a place that is more accepting and nurturing for artistic types.
I, for one, am not in a good position to leave Charleston at the moment, but I think about it sometimes. If I were plugging away for years at trying to make a difference I would consider this: is it really too hard to get things rolling here, or is it just necessary to make more and more noise until it’s too hard to ignore (and I realize even as I write this that it’s MUCH easier said than done). But people need to make more noise and get a reaction. Not in a negative way, of course. But more needs to be done and it’s good that you’re contributing to that even if it’s only temporary. Just posting a blog about it is at least giving it some kind of voice, and that’s a start. I’ve also heard great things about the Caberet.
I guess what I’m saying is that the idea of a collective is great and if you’re going to spend another year here then I say go for it. There are probably more people who’d be down than you’d expect.
I would have done a double take if I had seen THE Matt Bivins riding a scooter past me on the street.
I am one of the fortunate (when rent time rolls around, unfortunate) people to live here in SF who is planning on making a living in the creative field. Maybe not quite as creative as an artist, but I came here because this is one of the few hot beds for graphic designers. I figured I only had one life to live so I might as well try to make the most of it.
You were right about the beauty of this place. I’ve been in SF two years and still can’t believe that I live here. Will I stay here when I’m done with graduate school? I’m not sure, but I have no clue where else I’d want to go (besides maybe Charleston, I think it’s artists like you and your friends that make that place a little oasis in the south.)
The people I admire the most are people who have dreams and make them happen… or die trying to make them happen. I suppose that’s what kept bringing me back to Jump shows. Not only to show my support for a band who made music that I loved, but to support people who were living out a dream.
Having visited Charleston many times, I feel that you should give it your best effort over the next year to do what you can to move on to your next aspiration… and if that doesn’t work out, SF will still be here. I guarantee it.
in chicago you can take a segway tour of the city. you know you want to. but they make you wear helmets, and that kind of ruins it for me.